One thing to remember is that all relationships can go through a variety of phases. One month the relationship might be fine but then the next month you could be struggling and going through a hard time. It’s important to always know when your relationship is struggling and not deny it. Denying it can cause for things to get worse. Once you have noted that your relationship is struggling, you can then look for ways to improve it.
Here are 10 Ways To Strengthen A Struggling Relationship
- Talk with your partner about sharing
Sometimes partners might not feel as if they can share with you. Maybe they don’t know they can even share or scared you might respond to them in a negative way. Talk with your partner. Ask them if they can share with you on how they feel and how they are doing. Be ready to listen without thinking negative. Share your feelings at the same time. Maybe plan a date each week or month where the two of you share your feelings.
- Review your boundaries and make sure that they are healthy
When you’re sharing and talking with your partner be honest with them. If you just go with the flow of things and say whatever you think your partner might want to hear, then you might be setting things up for resentment or disappointment later. Your partner needs you to be honest because they cannot read what you are thinking. It’s the only way for the relationship to grow.
- Talk with your partner about what it takes for them to feel respected and loved
Each of us vary in what it takes for us to feel respected and loved. You might feel loved when your partner cooks a special meal that you enjoy. You partner might feel special if you do housework for them. See what needs your partner has and at the same time tell your partner what it takes for you to feel respected and loved.
- Turn off your cell phone, PC or tablet and really pay attention to them
These days it’s so easy to get distracted. When you’re trying to have a conversation with them your phone might be ringing every few seconds or you might be texting someone. This defeats the purpose of spending time with them. Before you spend time with them tell your family and friends to not contact you for awhile and that you will respond later on when you’re free. Your friends and family should understand. Think of it this way. Imagine you being at the movies and someone is texting throughout the movie. You would have a very hard time enjoying the movie. Your partner feels the same about you when you’re doing other things besides focusing on them at the time you two might finally be able to spend time together.
- After you’ve talked “let go” and forgive them
Ask them if after both of you have talked to each other that both of you can let go of what happened and forgive one another. One thing to know about forgiveness is that this does not give the other person permission to treat you wrongly. It just means that you accept at the time you’re doing the best that you two can do. Holding onto hurt doesn’t only damage the relationship but can even make you and your partner sick. This is all of the more reason to let go and fully forgive each other. Learn from what happened but don’t keep thinking about it. I know, easier said than done.
- Trust in your partner that their intentions are good
One mistake that we do is always believe in the bad with our partners. When we get this idea in our head it can be hard to see the good in them. We might even have a hard time with believing that they could be telling the truth. Once you’ve been disappointed or hurt, in your mind they could instantly become the new villain. If you want the relationship to turn around and give them another chance you have to reprogram your mind. Trust your partner and believe that they have good intentions.
- Create a secret language between each other
If you’re out with friends and having a hard time with being able to communicate with each other, problems might happen because of it. In order to avoid this from happening come up with a secret language that no one understands but the two of you. You might have it to where if you raise your eyebrow to your partner then they will know it’s time to go.
- Stop asking your partner questions that might make them uncomfortable
Talk with your partner about what questions might make them feel uncomfortable. I don’t mean just the day to day ordinary questions such as “would you like some tea right now?” What I am talking about is questions such as “Does this outfit look fat on me?” If you’re curious about how the outfit looks on you then ask your friends but word it in a different way such as “What do you think of this outfit on me?” Don’t ask your partner because if they tell you the truth, it might make you upset and cause problems.
- Stop trying to change your partner
Many people make the mistake of trying to change their partner. They want them to improve and get better but only under their terms. Stop trying to change your partner and let them improve on their own. Focus on trying to change yourself and not them. This will also help them to feel loved and accepted. When you’re always trying to change them; they might not feel neither of those feelings. So, focus on yourself and heal together.
- Don’t take things so seriously
Learn how to laugh around your partner. People make mistakes. Things might not go as planned. You might have to change your evening from rain or storms. You might have to change your clothes from an unexpected event. Try your best to just plan it for unexpected events. Get silly with your partner. Don’t take things out on your partner when stuff happens that you weren’t expecting to unfold.
Conclusion
Relationships might just take time to recover and heal. Don’t expect the change to happen overnight. You might also see if the two of you should go into therapy together but don’t nag your partner if they don’t want to do it.